‘Setting a good example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age’
Ok so technically 35 is not classed as middle age. However, I am so advanced I am already entering the mid life crisis stage. I’ve got profiles on dating sites, am a paid up member of Sunday Club and have drank vodka like there was a shortage!
Women do not approach mid life the same as men. Men get fancy cars, younger women, and, quite frankly, make themselves look like desperate old fools, clinging onto their youth by their fingernails. Women, on the other hand, invest. They invest their time in themselves. They ‘rediscover’ who they are, do things they would never normally have done, and realise that they do not need a man to validate them but if they have a man to, ahem, ‘validate’ them then it is strictly on an nsa basis.
On Friday I got my hair dyed. Not just one colour, but an array of purple, blue, red, green etc. My poor son is mortified at it but I don’t care. I never thought I’d say that, but I DON’T CARE! Hair is hair. It’s dead. It grows back, can be cut, shaved, dyed back, whatever. I just wanted to have something ‘different’ Like the tattoos. I have quite a few of those. The most recent takes up most of my left forearm (note to reader: never get a man’s name tattooed to you otherwise the cover up may have to be a big one) My tattoos signify me. My loves, my life journey and my appreciation of an art form. They scare people too. Which is odd, but a few people have made the comment that I’m going through a ‘punk’ phase because of the tattoos and hair! To be honest I’m trying to figure out who I am.
I’ve spent 14 years being wife and Mummy. I now have time when I am neither of those things and I realise I don’t actually know who I am. My mid life crisis is encompassing my need to reinvent myself as someone new. Someone who can live a breezy existence without the need for affirmation from another person. We constantly seek approval in our lives from everyone except ourselves. Yet, in reality, the most important person to impress IS ourselves. We are always there to rely on, to trust, to know what makes us better, yet we undervalue ourselves because the opinion of others matters more.
One gentleman who chatted to me constantly brought up the colour of my hair and emphasised that if we met up he wouldn’t be meeting the ‘real me’ and I will be honest, that pissed me right off. We are not defined by our hair, our tattoos, clothes or accents. We are defined by our honesty, compassion and zest for life. That guy missed out BIG time because of his attitude, and no doubt more will in the future.
My mid life crisis is going to be fun. By this time next year I may be rocking a pink shell suit and a blue rinse, but as long as I think I look awesome everyone else can kiss my middle aged arse!